Now that we all are living in home in the pandemic, it can be sometimes tiring listening to our parents complaint about every single thing. Try these six ways to maintain close relationship with your parents.
1. See it as a journey
See it as a journey
If you want to improve your relationship with your parents, be ready to commit to this as a journey, and not some X step, thing that you can execute in one week or one month. Let them know you’re truly sincere in changing the situation. Let them know that you’re not just doing this as a one-off fluke. Anticipate negativity in their reactions at first, because your changed behavior is probably new to them and they’re trying to adjust.
2. Take Responsibility
Take Responsibility
If you want to set mature boundaries in your adult relationship with your parents, then don’t ask your parents to do things for you that you can do for yourself. They are more likely to treat you like an adult if you act like one. For example, you might feel tempted to call your mother to complain every time you have a fight with your spouse. Or you may ask to borrow money when you need some extra cash to make it through the month. But just because one action is an easy solution doesn’t mean that it’s the best for a relationship. The more responsibility you can take for adult decisions, the more your parents will treat you like the adult you are.
3. Stay in Contact
Stay in contact
When things are tense with a parent, it can be all too easy to not return a phone call or not fly home for Thanksgiving. Communication is the key. When you were a kid, you couldn’t escape your parents, but cutting off contact is a choice many adults make. Unless the relationship is abusive and dangerous to your mental or physical health, cutting off contact is never an effective solution. Not speaking might feel good in the short term, but having an adult relationship with your parents, even a relationship that has conflict, is an opportunity to grow and mature as a human. If you can develop healthy communication with your parents, you can do it with almost anyone. If you have children, you’re also modeling the kind of relationship you’d like to have with them someday
4. Learn To Follow Their Advice
Learn to follow their advice
When it comes to learning about life, you can greatly benefit from your parents’ experience and wisdom. There is no greater teacher than experience. Because of your parent’s age, they simply have more years of experience than you, and therefore, often have the ability to identify the people, events, and circumstances that can greatly affect your life.
Many times, they have already been through what you are facing and understand how to react to the situation. While it’s humbling to admit, you do not have all the answers to life’s situations. Your parents’ experience can help you avoid all kinds of wrong choices that cause heart-breaking consequences.
5. Show Love to Your Parents
Show love to your parents
Everybody wants to be loved and appreciated. Your parents are no different. It is not enough for you to simply feel love for your parents; you need to express it to them. When you tell them you love them and are grateful to them for all they have done, it will have an incredible impact on your relationship.
Another way to express your love is by accepting their position of authority in your life. Like it or not, they do have the authority, so you need to show them respect even when you think they are wrong.
6. Seek and Give Forgiveness
Seek and give forgiveness
No doubt, your parents have offended you at some point. And, most likely, there have also been times when you have disappointed and hurt them. Maybe it was a lie, or a broken promise, or mean words said in a fit of anger. Whatever it is, it’s important for you to forgive and to seek forgiveness.
When you seek and offer forgiveness for hurt caused in the past, you are saying, “I love you and I don’t want there to be hurt between you and me. I care enough about our relationship to let go of my anger about how I’ve been hurt and to also recognize the wrong I have done and apologize.”